Fri 1
Today I would rather not have awakened to the strain of this love-tale. How long will God suffer this to go on. Three lives are being spoiled in this maze of doubt and worry. My prayer is - end it.
Sun 3
10 rds - rapid - 6 bulls, 2 outers - 2 off. Application 5 rds. 2 bulls [illegible]
Mon 4
Long range again, today, just to fire 10 rds. Ridiculous!
Tue 5
Wrote to Nellie after getting letter from her. I know she really loves my brother now. Happy man!
Wed 6
Route March. Went to see "David Garrick" in the evening. Not very much impressed with the acting, which was rather flat. Officers seem to be getting some joy rides out of the lady taxi drivers. Letter from Dorothea.
Thu 7
Wrote to Dorothea. I feel it is the extremity of foolishness but I am actually hoping again. O, could my wish come true how happy I should be. I made Dolly very unhappy. She is advised by Elsie Caddel to accept me. It would be safer and better for her to make some decision. I feel I can't go on just being her friend, I love her too well and she knows. I want her for myself. I can't bear to think of her belonging to any other. Why should she, yes, how can she love a man who is absolutely so far advanced in age, different in temperament, can't understand her and doesn't even pretend to love her in return? Will she never yield where youth and strong love calls to her?
Fri 8
Got my combination k. f. & s. from Nellie. Very pleased with it.
Sun 10
Supposed to have gone away this very evening.
Mon 11
Got my reply this morning. Evidently I made another mistake.
Tue 12
"What is God?" " I imagine that God is that longing in you for power and love"
Wed 13
Terrible long route march this morning. 50 men fell out. My feet very sore. Afternoon off parade.
Thu 14
Aircraft Picquet. Saw some of the old boys mount guard. Good Lord, I wouldn't have missed the sight for worlds. On the word "Left Form at the Halt!" the bugler commenced marching off at a rattling pace. One man fixed bayonets with rifle between his knees! Picquet officer grew wild.
Fri 15
Farewell supper. Left Colchester 9.30 p.m. Promised Lieut Hughes to write to him. Gave me very cordial parting.
Sat 16
Arrived Folkestone had breakfast - left 9.30 a.m. Escorted to Boulogne-sur-Mer arrived 12.30. Only allowed to write one field card. Sent it to mother. Not even allowed to go into the town.
Sun 17
Left [illegible] marching to base at Etaples. Gas drill. Equipped.
Tue 19
Commenced training in Bull Ring.
Wed 20
Wrote for some money.
Fri 22
Man the practice trenches at 9 p.m. Paid 5 francs. [illegible] owes me 1s. per week.
Mon 25
Letter from Dorothea. First communique received in France.
Tue 26
Having a rotten time with rations.
Wed 27
Wrote Nellie Mason a nice long letter.
Fri 29
Wrote Gerty. Won 2 1/2 francs at House.
Sat 30
Wrote Adlam. Received L.O. [S.O.?] from Gerty. 8th D.L.I. Draft prepared. Our turn next?